New Zealand Zombie

Video Transcript:

I know a lot of you have seen this clip before, but I'm making this video for my own records. This is the aftermath of the alleged New Zealand shooting. Looks like someone didn't do a very good job laying down that brand new carpet. You can see the seams clearly. We have lots of people moaning and wailing, and even casings are scattered across the floor. Wow, it looks so real. But we're going to watch this gentleman here with a teal coat and yellow trim. Notice that he's fine sitting there without any holes in him. Oh no, it looks like he had an awful turn of events. The man in the teal coat looks like he just died. Look, he even added some death throws there. Yes, let's watch that again. Very dramatic. Notice that our man with the teal coats feet are right next to another man in a grey hoodie wearing sunglasses. Yeah, we all wear hoodies and sunglasses indoors. I know, it's a crisis thing. That reminds me of that guy in the hoodie and sunglasses at the Boston Momming that actually ran towards the explosion. Here he is sitting calmly right after the explosion with everybody running, and then he makes his way over to the injured where he becomes one of the injured. This is how David McGowan put it. What that means, of course, is that while everyone else was moving quickly away from the scene, hoodie plunged right into the midst of the smoke cloud. And as we already know, he didn't do that to offer assistance to victims. He did it to play the role of a victim himself. And amazingly enough, he was unable to move himself into position despite having two exposed femurs, shredded legs, and a degloved right hand. But let's leave hoodie alone for now. Notice the guy in the plaid shirt taking his selfie on his cell phone holding a child. Yep, our till guy is certainly dead now. His face is down in the carpet. He's not moving. I don't see any holes in him, but I'm sure he's hurting on the inside. This is just so sad. Oh, the moaning just really gets to you. Okay, yeah, let's film outside a little bit. Photographer is doing a great job showing us the entire scene. Well, the till guy is still there. Now, as we would expect, poor guy. Oh, and there's a bit of gore there. Horrible. Absolutely horrible. There's some more. Yep, there are some casings there. You wouldn't want to miss that in your video. We've made our way back to hoodie. Sunglasses guy, but where the dead till man's feet. Oh no, where is he? Where did he go? plaid man is still taking selfies. There he is. There he is. The dead Muslim is walking away. There is a zombie in New Zealand. From sitting to death rose to dead, face down in the carpet to walking zombie in 60 seconds. Who cares about a phony shooting with amateur crisis actors? We are facing a zombie apocalypse. The stupidity of these crisis actors never ceases to amaze me, but it does provide hours of entertainment. In case any of you are claiming that I took anything out of context, here's the entire clip without any edits. Thanks everybody. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no